Unicorns of the Hydrocalypse

That's What She Said, Episode 1

2011-03-04T16:11:00.001-08:00

Lab Fashion

2011-02-01T14:11:00.000-08:00

Bill Cunningham visits the lab!

Meet Ginkgo BioWorks

2010-10-07T20:06:00.000-07:00

Here's the recruiting video we made for our friends at Ginkgo!

This is what delicious looks like

2010-05-06T10:49:00.000-07:00

http://pubs.acs.org/doi/abs/10.1021/jf00116a038

You Spin Silk Right Round

2010-05-04T12:37:00.000-07:00

My silkworms are very good dancers.

Which team are you on?

2010-04-12T12:59:00.000-07:00

We're a little late on the Twilight bandwagon, but we have what you've all been waiting for: Team Watson and Team Crick t-shirts! Note that there is no Team Rosalind Franklin shirt because we're all on her team.

The Beard-ome

2010-04-01T10:21:00.000-07:00

As we have uncovered more and more of the DNA sequences in the world around us through large-scale genomics projects, there is one place that has been notably left out--the human beard. Here at Hydrocalypse Industries we are committed to uncovering the truth lying beneath our beards through the first-ever large scale beardomics research initiative. Check out http://beardome.info for more information, and enjoy this first look behind the scenes at the beardomics project.

Unicorn Meat

2010-04-01T10:19:00.000-07:00

Canned Unicorn Meat now available, for your daily dose of sparkles!

Lady Gaga's Lab Romance

2010-02-28T10:16:00.000-08:00

The Unicorns of the Hydrocalypse are proud to present Lab Romance. Music by Lady Gaga, lyrics by Tami Lieberman and Jake Wintermute, performed by Jake Wintermute, edited by Christina Agapakis and Patrick Boyle, dancing by the Silver Lab.

New Video!!!

2010-02-22T08:27:00.000-08:00

You may have noticed that we've been a bit busy lately and the constant stream of hilarious new multi-media projects has slowed to a mere trickle. Well, now we're back and better than ever! Here is the first in a hopefully rushing river of awesome video projects, lab techno:

Antarctica, where are you?

2009-12-13T14:02:00.000-08:00

In our quest to reach a global audience, we have been successful in attracting visitors from every continent...except one. If you know anyone in Antarctica, could you tell them to fire up their dial-up modem and check out hydrocalypse.com? Bonus points if you can provide documentation. Speaking of frozen wastelands, what's your deal Greenland? I assume you have the internet there. Iceland's off the hook until the whole economic collapse thing is over.

BEARDOME UPDATE: New Trailer!

2009-12-09T15:12:00.000-08:00

We're still in the principle photography phase here on the set of THE BEARDOME, but we've collected enough footage to release a full-length theatrical trailer. We're still on track for a December 2009 release, although Jake is refusing to grow a beard on only the left half of his face for a key scene in the film. We're in negotiations with his agent, stay tuned.

Coming Soon: The Beardome

2009-12-04T08:26:00.000-08:00

Here at Hydrocalypse Industries headquarters we're hard at work on our latest film project. The budget is bigger than for any previous video we've ever done, and we blew most it on this teaser trailer. Stay tuned for more updates from the set.

The Power of Beards

2009-12-02T11:45:00.000-08:00

We've recently been inspired by the diversity, the power, and the biological importance of beards. We have begun a new and exciting project in beard science, cataloging the microflora of the beard phenotypically, genetically, genomically, and a whole-lotta-other-omically. More to come...

(via mrgan)

The best iPhone app of all time

2009-12-01T13:54:00.000-08:00

Emirates has developed our favorite iPhone app. iLingual is a great program that helps you learn a new language (French, German, or Arabic), get around in a foreign country, and annoy everyone during lab coffee breaks. Best of all, it's free! Check out the video to see it in action!

Purchase the Hydrocalypse

2009-11-19T16:14:00.000-08:00

Just in time for the holidays! Official Hydrocalypse Industries merchandise! Not sure what to get for your child? How about a nifty hydrocalypse.com sticker for his lunchbox! Looking for a personal gift for that special someone? Try our his and hers line of underwear! Check out our store at Cafe Press, the only place to get official Hydrocalypse Industries products!

The Hydrocalypse Industries store at Cafe Press

dinosaurs.

2009-11-17T11:45:00.000-08:00

dressing your babies in this will guarantee their becoming awesome scientists.

2009-10-29T08:24:00.001-07:00

first rattle? medical tricorder.

Mission to Mold

2009-10-27T17:52:00.000-07:00

We wage many battles in our day job as scientists. One enemy in particular remains undefeated: the second law of thermodynamics. Our lab's bacterial incubators are the front line against the Universe's relentless march of increasing entropy.

Incubators are really good at growing bacteria...and mold. Sometimes a flask is forgotten for several months, yielding mold where yeast or e. coli used to be, spawning a beast that threatens our very lives. Even a bath in pure bleach wasn't enough for this guy:

In another flask nearby, another mold creature had evolved:

We decided that extreme measures would be required to destroy them. But first, we needed an inspirational speech:

Sufficiently pumped up by Capt. Picard's defense of humanity, we donned our personal protective equipment:

Adding more bleach only made a foamy mess:

Undeterred, we brought out our next weapon: liquid nitrogen.

Despite the creatures' pleas for leniency, we poured their bleach-ravaged remains into a -196 degree C pool:

We waited for what seemed like hours, haunted by the screams of the mold as it succumbed to a frozen grave:

As the cloud settled, we were met with a reassuring sight: the exploded remnants of our moldy foe:

Humble as always, we took a moment to celebrate our victory. The carcass of the beast, smelling like a combination of plague-ridden foot and desiccated fly larvae, was unceremoniously dumped into the biohazard waste bin.

Having won this battle, the lab will remain safe for another day. As distinguished scholars, our epic battle immediately recalled that of Lt. Cdr. Worf, who gloriously fought in a Bat'leth competition on Forcas III:

The conditions were difficult, several contests were maimed, but we too were triumphant.

Who is the fourth unicorn?

2009-10-23T14:30:00.000-07:00

The power struggle that raged during the redesign is over. Christina, Jake, and I retained our rank as Unicorns of the Hydrocalypse. Michael, however, who has returned to his native Dutch land was demoted from Unicorn to Horse. He remains an important part of the Hydrocalypse Industries family in his reduced role, but there must always be four Unicorns. In recent days someone has risen to fill Michael's place. The identity of the fourth Unicorn will not be revealed today, but we are ready to release footage of this person in action.

BEHOLD YOUR NEW MASTER

2009-10-13T16:45:00.000-07:00

We're undergoing a redesign at hydrocalypse.com: UOTH is about to become a wholly owned subsidiary of HYDROCALYPSE INDUSTRIES(TM). This restructuring will allow us to fine tune our multimedia assault. We cannot provide further information at this time.

Science: Just Do It

2009-10-06T12:01:00.000-07:00

Another inspirational science commercial from Hydrocalypse Industries.

Rorschach Test

2009-09-21T14:10:00.000-07:00

Source

Real Science

2009-09-14T15:38:00.000-07:00

Here is some of our data, movies of fish with bacteria living inside of their cells!

Scientist T-shirts

2009-09-05T10:55:00.000-07:00

Pre-order now for your very own scientist face shirt! Choose from Francis Crick, Marie Curie, Rosalind Franklin, Albert Einstein or a scientist of your choice!

What's G?

2009-08-25T10:28:00.000-07:00

Everyone is familiar with hyperbole-laden sports commercials, especially those made by Gatorade. What people are less familiar with is that the Unicorns were approached to make a special commercial for the "What's G" campaign featuring a scientist. Since we're big fans of avoiding dehydration and Lil' Wayne, we agreed. Gerald, our resident ~~German~~ Austrian scientist with a name that starts with G, stars. (The following video is also available in glorious HD)

Hey Senator, stay out of my research!!!

2009-08-12T06:37:00.000-07:00

Senator Sam Brownback recently introduced a bill to congress to ban the creation of human-animal hybrids that blur the line between species. Clearly, this is a huge setback for synthetic biology.

Fun With Agar

2009-08-09T12:18:00.001-07:00

Please, don't try this at home.

UotH T-shirts--first draft

2009-08-07T07:10:00.001-07:00

THE MINIPREP CHALLENGE

2009-07-27T08:15:00.000-07:00

Everything is more fun when it's a mean-spirited competition, so we decided to have a little miniprep challenge in lab (minipreps are ways to isolate circular pieces of DNA from bacterial cells). Everything is even more fun when it is culturally insensitive, so we decided to compete against all the German (and Austrian) students in our lab. Unicorns (and USA) vs. Germans, in all-out plasmid prep battle...CAN...YOU...HANDLE...IT!!!?!??!?!!!

We decided that we couldn't just compete on time, because cutting corners can reduce the DNA yield. Our final measure was nanograms of DNA isolated over seconds of miniprep time. If you think you can beat the Unicorns, we did eight five milliliter minipreps of the pCDF-Duet vector, a low copy plasmid from Novagen. Try just beating us on time though, I dare ya.

Final Scores:

Respond to the video on youtube or comment on this post if you think your lab is awesomer (ha!), or if you are a Qiagen representative and want to give us free stuff/a lucrative sponsorship.

For First-Year Grad Students

2009-07-20T07:51:00.000-07:00

Synthetic Biology v.0.1

2009-06-29T06:57:00.000-07:00

Before there were genomes, DNA, or confocal microscopes, there were dudes doing synthetic biology in France. Despite what almost every single paper on synthetic biology says, the term was actually coined in the early 20th century by Stéphane Leduc, who spent all of his time mixing together various salts and chemicals and seeing how osmosis (left) could mimic the properties of "real life" (right). Maybe in 100 years when everyone knows better they will ignore our treatises as well.

Unicorns Endorsement

2009-06-22T18:30:00.000-07:00

We talked it over and the official animal of the Hydrocalypse will be the Slow Loris. We love you Slow Loris. Who's a good Slow Loris? You are!

We considered endorsing the Unicorn, but that seemed a little incestuous.

2009-05-15T13:04:00.000-07:00

Who's got three thumbs and love electrophoresis?

These Unicorns.

Best Picture

2009-05-11T18:46:00.000-07:00

No, this isn't another post about Star Trek. This is about my new favorite photo, chock full of famous synthetic biologists. I'm hoping it is the first in a series of us posing with celebrity scientists.

Special thanks to David Jeruzalmi for taking this marvelous photo, Craig Venter for having a good sense of humor, and George Church for making that crazy face off to the side.

Star Trek: (Pon Farr)^(Pon Farr)

2009-05-10T08:00:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling like I was born on the wrong planet. Just feast your eyes people. Feast. Your. Eyes.

Is Spock sterile?

2009-05-08T10:17:00.001-07:00

First things first, the Unicorn's rating for the new Star Trek movie:

Overall Scale: 4.5 out of 5 Pon Farrs

Things blow up. Kirk and Spock fight aliens. Chekov and Scotty show off their funny accents. A few space babes, but its not the same when Kirk isn't wearing a girdle. There were no debates about morality or the prime directive, maybe next time (there was too much stuff to blow up this time).

Now, for our post-movie discussion topic. Its no spoiler to say that Spock is half-Vulcan, half-Human. According to my calculations, there is only a 1.5 x 10^-22 chance that Humans and Vulcans have fully compatible chromosomes (and I am of course taking into account the common galactic origin of humanoids). This means he is likely sterile. It has not escaped our attention that this may have consequences for Pon Farr. I hope that the new Star Trek series will properly explore the angsty new Spock's conflicting urges. It would certainly be logical.

Unicorn Endorsement

2009-05-08T10:00:00.000-07:00

Lil Wayne: Official Recording Artist of the Hydrocalypse

out of this world though
i'm so sci-fi
and i don't sit still i
keep it movin like a drive-by

Unicorns School of Design

2009-05-07T11:35:00.000-07:00

We at the Hydrocalypse have a passion for design. When it comes to agarose gel electrophoresis, we know that good science can be beautiful, and beauty is truth. Our design philosophy acknowledges the metaphysical continuity from science to engineering, function, form and art.

Our colleague and Friend of the Unicorns, Buz Barstow, has recently auteured these sketches for an agarose gel mold.

Clean lines, modern design, all calibrated to within one micron. Brought to you by the Unicorns of the Hydrocalypse.

Star Trek Theme Week: TNG Identity Crisis

2009-05-07T08:20:00.000-07:00

With the Unicorn's exclusive viewing of the new Star Trek movie only hours away (Pre-Review: its going to be awesome), the blog content explosion must continue. Today, we analyze another biology themed TNG episode: "Identity Crisis."

As Synthetic Biologists™ we know that completely rewriting the DNA of an organism is fun and anyone can do it. All you need is years of expertise and millions of dollars. In the future, any yahoo with a tricorder and a Galaxy-class starship can do the same.

On stardate 44664.5, we discover that members of Geordi LaForge's old crew abord the USS Victory are mysteriously disappearing. Upon realizing that all those disappearing were all members of a mission to an unexplored planet, Geordi and the Enterprise return to investigate (always a bad idea). They find a planet full of mysterious aliens that are invisible to the naked eye. Here's the shocking twist: some of those aliens are actually the former crew members, who got infected when they visited the planet. The aliens reproduce by a method much more efficient than sexual reproduction: infected visitors have their DNA rewritten over a number of years, and once the transformation is nigh, the infected people experience an uncontrollable urge to return to the planet. During the investigation, Geordi transforms into an alien, ditches his clothes, and runs around naked on the planet's surface. With time running out in the episode, Data decides that its time he gets involved, devises a way to detect the invisible aliens, and Dr. Crusher resets all of Geordi's DNA to its original state in time for supper.

Lessons learned about rewriting DNA:
- Why have sex when you can create an overly elaborate virus? (the aliens must have been lovelorn synthetic biologists)
- It can make you invisible (I believe that this was accomplished via GFP and the Lac promoter)
- It can induce uncontrollable urges (there's a Pon Farr joke in there somewhere)
- Its easy to do and undo (we're still working on the second part)

So there you have it. I have more thoughts on Star Trek, but its time to get in line for the new movie!

Craig Venter is on a Boat

2009-05-06T17:07:00.000-07:00

I know what you're thinking: how is it possible to make two awesome videos in one week? Well, it takes hard work, patience, and inspiration. This time, in the form of Craig Venter and his amazing boat. For those of you who may not know, Craig Venter has been described as "The Justin Timberlake of synthetic biology;" he is one of the co-sequencers of the original human genome sequence, and is currently working on building whole genomes from scratch. At the same time, he goes yachting with sequencing machines so that he can "find cool stuff" in the ocean and "get a tan." To you, sir, we tip our hats.

And don't worry, we haven't forgotten about star trek week. Here is a video of me killing Klingons in 1990.

BREAKING NEWS: SWINE FLU SOURCE IDENTIFIED

2009-05-06T15:24:00.000-07:00

We must briefly interrupt Star Trek week with important news. Taking some time out of our normal research, we've isolated the original animal from which the current swine flu outbreak started. Footage below.

Stay tuned for more Star Trek and more videos....

Star Trek Theme Week: TNG Genesis

2009-05-05T14:33:00.000-07:00

The events of 47653.2 should be an example to those of us in the Synthetic Biology community. For our (presumably few) readers unfamiliar with stardates, I am referring to the tragedy that befell the Enterprise D in 2370 as she tracked a stray torpedo through the Typhon Expanse.

The story is painful to recall, even hundreds of years before it will happen. Lieutenant Barclay gets the Urodelan flu, so Dr. Crusher activates his dormant genes with a synthetic T-cell for treatment. But Dr. Crusher, getting sloppy, misinterprets her agarose gels and fucks up the T-cell transfections. So naturally the cells run amok on the Enterprise, activating the crew's secret introns and causing them to devolve into whatever weirdo animals their species evolved from. Long story short, Barclay devolves into a spider, Dr. Crusher gets sprayed with venom, Data's cat turns into an iguana for some reason, and Ensign Dern is gored by a space-crab.

Ensign Dern: Another victim of Synthetic T Cells.

So what lessons can scientists draw from this? The first lesson is obviously to avoid over-medication. As is well known, the Urodelan flu is generally mild. Even in the 24th century, fluids and bed rest are the best medicine.

Second lesson: All engineered organisms eventually escape and run amok. So what are you going to do about it when it happens? Lysine contingency? Suicide gene? Release a new organism, deadlier still, to hunt and kill the first thing? I don't have all the answers, so I'm happy to leave this thorny question to the appallingly uninformed voters.

Thirdly, what is all this iguana and spider DNA doing in the human genome? Do you want monkeys in your introns? Gross! I propose that we use Synthetic Genomics, sister-discipline of Synthetic Biology, to rewrite the human genome and eliminate all non-human DNA. This kind of thing is already working for viruses, therefore humans are the next logical step. If we can get it done by 47653.2, we may be in time to save Ensign Dern.

Early 21st century genetic engineering

2009-05-04T11:04:00.000-07:00

According to Star Trek, Khan was a genetic superhuman that was created in the 1990s. As 21st century genetic engineers, we have advanced far beyond that. Here's our latest creation in action:

I'm referring to the stuff inside the tube, not Christina. As far as I know, she isn't genetically engineered...or is she?

Star Trek Week

2009-05-04T08:40:00.001-07:00

Unless you live under a rock you know that the new Star Trek movie is coming out this week (and if you do, please collect some dirt samples for us). For this wonderful week, we will honor our love of Star Trek through blogging from our special futuristic biology point of view.

To get started, I just want to mention what is probably the best known of the Star Trek biological breakthroughs: Khan Noonien Singh. Khan may be "the product of late 20th century genetic engineering," but that chest, my friends, is simply a work of art.

Read This Book: Laboratory Life

2009-04-23T18:25:00.000-07:00

The attempt to demystify science isn't new. In the seventies, the young French philosopher (this is already sounding awesome, right?) Bruno Latour spent two years in a neuroendocrinology lab at the Salk Institute. The book that he wrote on his experience, Laboratory Life: The Construction of Scientific Facts, details his observations of the scientists as if he were an anthropologist studying a mysterious foreign "tribe." Through spending time with the tribespeople and learning to think and speak like them, he was able to uncover how scientists collect, learn about, talk about, and present scientific data.

I can't tell you why you should read this book any better than Jonas Salk himself did in the book's introduction so I'm just going to copy some of the good parts of that from here.

"Scientists often have an aversion to what nonscientists say about science. Scientific criticism by nonscientists is not practiced in the same way as literary criticism by those who are not novelists or poets...

A love-hate relationship exists toward scientists in some segments of society. This is evident in accounts that deal with facets ranging from tremendously high expectations of scientific studies to their cost and their dangers--all of which ignore the content and process of scientific work itself...However, the present book is somewhat different from accounts usually written by nonscientists about science...[Latour] has tried to to observe scientists with the same cold and unblinking eye with which cells, or hormones, or chemical reactions are studied...

I am now convinced that this kind of direct examination of scientists at work should be extended and should be encouraged by scientists themselves in our own best interest, and in the best interest of society...If the public could be helped to understand how scientific knowledge is generated and could understand that it is comprehensible and no more extraordinary than any other field of endeavor, they would not expect more of scientists than they are capable of delivering, nor would they fear scientists as much as they do. This would clarify not only the social position of scientists in society, but also the public understanding of the substance of science, of scientific pursuits and of the creation of scientific knowledge. It is sometimes discouraging that although we dedicate our lives to the extension of knowledge, to shedding light and exemplifying rationality in the world, the work of individual scientists, or the work of scientists in general, is often understood only in a sort of magical or mystical way.

Even if we do not agree with the details of this book, or if we find it slightly uncomfortable or even painful in places, the present work seems to me to be a step in the right direction toward dissipating the mystery that is believed to surround our activity."

Seriously, read this book.

Great Douchebags of Science: Caleb Kennedy

2009-04-21T19:28:00.000-07:00

Congrats on getting your PhD, douchebag. We'll miss you. May life in industry be full of excitement and mystery.

OMG LOL

2009-04-20T10:09:00.000-07:00

Demystifying DNA electrophoresis

2009-04-19T18:22:00.000-07:00

One of my goals for our blog is to show (to the few people who may read this who don't know us personally) that scientists are just like regular people whose job happens to be mixing together clear liquids all day. For this reason, I am pretty interested in DIYbio, a group that aims to make science, and biology in particular, more accessible to people who are interested in viewing the world around them scientifically but maybe don't have a degree in science. [What follows is probably the most serious/boring post we have on here, but believe it or not, we are serious sometimes and this is something I feel is important enough to go into excruciating detail about. Feel free to skip this and go back to looking up cusses in scholarly journals.]

I think it is totally awesome that people who don't have a lot of experience with science think that biology is cool enough to meet at bars to talk about, and it is great that people want to do experiments. However, in the process of demystifying biology so that amateurs can interact with things like bacteria, DNA, and even genomes, DIYbio often ends up pushing "traditional" science further into the abstract ivory tower. This is especially true I think in the discussions around how to do DNA electrophoresis (separating different pieces of DNA based on their size). In seeing what DIYbio is proposing as methods for doing this common lab technique, it is clear that the people who do it every day (grad students, post docs, and technicians working in labs everywhere) haven't done a really good job of explaining how the data that is finally presented to the public is "made"; that is, how the experiments are actually done. What people end up seeing is what biotech companies that want you to buy their $1000+ electrophoresis setups are saying.

I hope that in showing how we do DNA electrophoresis in our lab (at the ivoriest of all towers, harvard) I can show how experimental biology is often hacked together and DIY (which makes it really fun and sometimes frustrating) and has a lot more to offer than the final reports of what we make of the experimental results, and way more to offer than the bio-rad website. I'm not going to go through all of the DIYbio proposals on how to do gels, because the discussion boards listed above already go into good detail about what would work and what wouldn't and why. My goal is just to show that the way that we do it is already pretty cheap and is actually quite similar to some of the final proposals for the DIY gel box from Pearl Biotech.

So here's my method for making DNA gels, illustrated with some fancy cell phone camerawork. First, I weigh out some agarose, mix it with saline, and microwave it for two minutes. Agarose is relatively expensive at $420 for 500 grams, but you only need 1 gram per gel so it should last for a long time.

While the agarose is microwaving I put together my gel tray. We use a simple piece of plastic put together for us by the harvard machine shop wrapped with masking tape (really) around the bottom so that the melted agarose doesn't fall out. A small plastic comb makes the wells where I'll put the DNA.

Now my agarose is melted, and here comes the tricky part. We add ethidium bromide here, a super toxic, absolutely (maybe) will kill you DNA stain that allows us to see where the DNA is. This stuff is difficult to dispose of safely, and there are some other options for DNA stains that are more expensive, but probably better if you're going to be doing this someplace that doesn't have OSHA people all over it.

Now I've poured my gel into my prepared gel tray and let it harden, it's time to load my DNA.

I put it into a plastic box, also made by the machine shop. This box is filled with the same saline solution I used to dissolve my agar, and has a wire running through it that can be connected to any power source. I mix the DNA with a solution of glycerol and a dye. The dye lets you see how far your sample has run through the gel, and the glycerol is heavier than water so it lets the DNA fall into the wells that the comb made in the gel.

After running a voltage through the gel for about 20 minutes the gel is ready to look at under UV light. This makes the ethidium bromide glow where it has bound to the DNA and you can take a picture of the gel.

Tada! I hope that this shows that lab scientists and home scientists have a lot in common when we have similar goals, in this case separating out some DNA. I think if what people saw about DNA wasn't on CSI, Gattaca-like tests that gave you statistically suspect percentages for disease risk, or $500 canvases with DNA fingerprints that people wouldn't think scientists are so weird, and maybe would be even more interested in talking about biology at a bar. If you think this is a good idea, let us know. If you think it's boring, let us know; we can go back to talking about Star Trek and poop.

Numerical Analysis of Profanity in the PubMed Database

2009-04-12T21:14:00.000-07:00

Here at UotH headquarters, we are primarily concerned with bringing about the Hydrocalypse and self-aggrandizement. In order to continue receiving our government ~~welfare~~ stipend checks, however, we must occasionally do research. As Systems Biologists, this means we spend as much time on the computer as possible trying to avoid doing actual experiments. This often means looking at data that other people collected and pulling conclusions out of a hat. As an example, we present an analysis of profanity in the PubMed database.

PubMed is a massive database curated by the NIH that contains most articles written this century on biology and medicine. It is also full of swears:

This is a good first pass at the data, but we know that power law distributions are all the rage these days, so we need to make the data look more power-law-y. Randomly adding parameters to our model revealed a missing parameter that completes our graph:

Much better. A thoughtful scientist would want to delve deeper into the data to discover the mechanisms through which swears end up on PubMed. Running a hidden-Markov chain model on the data classified the causes of bad words on PubMed into the following categories:

1. Snarky scientists

"Poop" is a prime offender for this one, as evidenced by the following titles of actual papers on PubMed:

The scoop on baby's poop.

Dysfunctional defecation. "Why 'Jane' can't poop!".

Primate genetics. Getting the poop on baboon DNA.

Using cutesy terms in articles about dysfunctionally defecating babies is something we approve.

2. Poor abbreviation choices

The study of the metabolism of fucose has lead to awesomest group of genes in the history of biology: the "fuc" genes. As is tradition in the identification of E. coli genes, each gene in a pathway gets a four letter name, leading to fucA, fucB, fucC...all the way to the #1 gene of all time: fucK, which as everyone knows encodes the enzyme L-fuculokinase. As expected, this leads to some great papers, like this one:

A mutant crp allele that differentially activates the operons of the fuc regulon in Escherichia coli.

Zhu Y, Lin EC.

Department of Microbiology and Molecular Genetics, Harvard Medical School, Boston, Massachusetts 02115.

L-Fucose is used by Escherichia coli through an inducible pathway mediated by a fucP-encoded permease, a fucI-encoded isomerase, a fucK-encoded kinase, and a fucA-encoded aldolase. The adolase catalyzes the formation of dihydroxyacetone phosphate and L-lactaldehyde. Anaerobically, lactaldehyde is converted by a fucO-encoded oxidoreductase to L-1,2-propanediol, which is excreted. The fuc genes belong to a regulon comprising four linked operons: fucO, fucA, fucPIK, and fucR. The positive regulator encoded by fucR responds to fuculose 1-phosphate as the effector. Mutants serially selected for aerobic growth on propanediol became constitutive in fucO and fucA [fucO(Con) fucA(Con)], but noninducible in fucPIK [fucPIK(Non)]. An external suppressor mutation that restored growth on fucose caused constitutive expression of fucPIK. Results from this study indicate that this suppressor mutation occurred in crp, which encodes the cyclic AMP-binding (or receptor) protein. When the suppressor allele (crp-201) was transduced into wild-type strains, the recipient became fucose negative and fucose sensitive (with glycerol as the carbon and energy source) because of impaired expression of fucA. The fucPIK operon became hyperinducible. The growth rate on maltose was significantly reduced, but growth on L-rhamnose, D-galactose, L-arabinose, glycerol, or glycerol 3-phosphate was close to normal. Lysogenization of fuc+ crp-201 cells by a lambda bacteriophage bearing crp+ restored normal growth ability on fucose. In contrast, lysogenization of [fucO(Con)fucA(Con)fucPIK(Non)crp-201] cells by the same phage retarded their growth on fucose.

This paper received extra points for remarking that growth on fucose is "retarded."

3. Unfortunate language issues

Many scientific papers are written in english by scientists who don't primarily speak english. As ugly Americans, we feel free to mock these papers. It appears that "bitch" is a favorite in this category, as female dog research seems to be popular overseas. Our old friend "poop" again makes an appearance in this category, along with his PG-13 friend, "shit":

[Termino-lateral esophago-jejunal anastomosis with a defunctionalized poop: technic of choice in total amplified gastrectomy]

Multi-format receiver for non-return-to-zero binary-phase-shift-keyed and non-return-to-zero amplitude-shit-keyed signals.

Of course, defunctionalized poop is no laughing matter, but farts are always funny:

Automatic analysis of signals with symbolic content.

Moreno L, Estévez JI, Aguilar RM, Sánchez JL, Sigut J, Piñeiro JD, Marichal R.

Department of Applied Physics, University of La Laguna, C/ Astrofísico Sánchez. Ed. de Física y Matemáticas, CP 38200, La Laguna, Spain.

This paper presents a set of methods for helping in the analysis of signals with particular features that admit a symbolic description. The methodology is based on a general discrete model for a symbolic processing subsystem, which is fuzzyfied by means of a fuzzy inference system. In this framework a number of design problems have been approached. The curse of dimensionality problem and the specification of adequate membership functions are the main ones. In addition, other strategies, which make the design process simpler and more robust, are introduced. Their goals are automating the production of the rule base of the fuzzy system and composing complex systems from simpler subsystems under symbolic constrains. These techniques are applied to the analysis of wakefulness episodes in the sleep EEG. In order to solve the practical difficulty of finding remarkable situations from the outputs of the symbolic subsystems an unsupervised adaptive learning technique (FART network) has been applied.

We couldn't gain access to the actual paper for this one, so we took the liberty of reconstructing what the FART network looks like:

As you can see, the FART network is also scale-free.

4. Funny last names

Amazingly, despite the breakthroughs in fuc research, many of the papers that appear on a PubMed search for "fuck" are written by scientists with the last name of "Fuck." Since we've never seen ads for Fuck family reunions around these parts, we're guessing that this is also a language issue.

5. BONUS: In rare cases, multiple swears end up in a single paper. The preponderance of Dr. Fucks, combined with the important bitch research being conducted throughout the world, has lead to a single paper:

Ovarian teratoma in a bitch.

Headley SA, Fuck EJ, Fuck ET, Curti CE.

Department of Preventive Veterinary Medicine, Universidade Estadual de Landline, Londrina, Paraná 86051-990, Brazil.

Scientific writing doesn't often inspire poetry, but this paper is beautiful in its simplicity and directness. Feel free to recite this at your next poetry slam:

Ovarian teratoma in a bitch.

Fuck. Fuck.

Sassy Bitches of Science: Happy Ada Lovelace Day!

2009-03-24T11:10:00.000-07:00

Today is Ada Lovelace Day, where the internet celebrates all the Sassy Bitches of Technology.

All over the internet there are awesome blog posts about sassy bitches doing their part for science and technology, including my new favorite, the awesomely sassy Grace Murray Hopper:

Have a sassy day everyone, and get ready for Sassy Bitches of Science: Rosalind Franklin--coming soon!

Evolution in a Can

2009-03-20T07:36:00.001-07:00

If you only saw this blog, you would think that we spend most of our time thinking about television and getting famous. While this is true, we also spend a lot of time thinking about science and how to bring the hydrocalypse. Most of our work focuses on trying to artificially evolve hydrogen-producing enzymes to be stronger. Another huge area of effort is coming up with acronyms. For example, this artificial evolution strategy is referred to as the "Hydrogenase Isolating Life-form: A Novel Directed Evolution Reactor," or:

There can be only one.

Creating a sitcom based on the lab step 1: casting

2009-03-17T13:31:00.000-07:00

For our new sitcom "The Lab," we decided to start with casting and go from there. There's a lot of people in the lab, so we started with the people in the two bays that house the bloggers, the boss, and people we constantly make fun of.

First, the boss-

The bloggers-

The baymates-

And our good friends who have a good sense of humor when we make jokes about them-

Please pass this along to any friends in the industry!

DOMINATING THE AIRWAVES

2009-03-11T13:51:00.000-07:00

WE CANNOT BE CONTAINED BY INTERNET MEDIA ALONE. WE MUST EXPAND TO THE RADIO DIMENSION.

DOWNLOAD UOTH ON SOUNDTRACK SCIENCE

thanks to Annie and WMBR!

VIDEO BLOG 1: The Odd Couple!

2009-01-14T07:53:00.000-08:00

The Odd Couple for the 21st century.

What do you do when you have a phage contamination?

2008-12-17T08:44:00.001-08:00

Start a war.

The adventures of Spongy the dinosaur, by Jake

2008-12-10T05:17:00.000-08:00

rawr

Is WoW a scale-free network?

2008-11-17T17:01:00.001-08:00

via

Trek LARP

2008-11-11T15:14:00.001-08:00

Star Trek live action role playing in italian: awesome or super-awesome?

Twittering

2008-11-11T13:22:00.000-08:00

You can now follow our antics on twitter, if you're into that. Also check out SynBioNauts for slightly more serious twittering from the extended Silver lab.

Watch Out Humanity! We're SCIENTISTS

2008-10-27T19:56:00.000-07:00

Ok dudes, sometimes, science is bad. Sometimes people think that you can use science to make the human race better and then oops! you got sterilized! Sometimes chemicals are poured all over everything and then oops! you got cancer! But sometimes, the way science, and particularly synthetic biology is perceived is WAY scarier (and competent) than it actually is. Our favorite prediction is too good to paraphrase:

"Imagine an artfully designed fungus that looks like a hat; when you put it on, it digests your head and turns it into a still-conscious, rubbery Super Ball an inch across, suitable for easy launch into space. Once there, another fungus might then reconstitute your head and form a protective life-sustaining bubble around it."

He does qualify this a bit, and the rest of the article actually has some good points, so you should read it after you stop laughing about the fungus hats. The point I'm trying to make is that there are limits to what science can do that are grounded in real facts. Most people don't know a lot of facts about science so it's not that surprising that someone would hear "synthetic biology" and think of the worst. From now on, can we try to be as non-threatening as possible? Let's rename synthetic biology to "trying out new things and seeing what happens biology" or "unicorns and rainbows biology."

Maybe then there wouldn't be any more TV shows about evil scientists ruining everything.

9 days till the election!

2008-10-26T12:02:00.000-07:00

Special Team Mission Recap

2008-10-23T09:06:00.001-07:00

We recently returned from a trip to Hong Kong to attend SB 4.0 the fourth international conference on Synthetic Biology. While there we learned many things about synthetic biology, about circadian rhythms, and about our western prejudices about food preparation.

Re: Synthetic Biology, if there are new ideas out there, no one's talking about them because half the attendees were there to steal other people's ideas. There were even actual industrial spies there, although no one as dangerously beautiful Elena Sandoval from The Green Trap. Seriously, guy from Monsanto taking pictures of posters and not talking to anyone? Douchebag.

Re: food

We're Back

2008-10-23T08:36:00.000-07:00

We're actually going to start blogging more, for real.

The Unicorns do Science in the News

2008-09-09T08:27:00.000-07:00

Science in the News is a seminar series where smartypants Harvard grad students talk to people in the community about science. We're going to be giving a presentation on biofuels on September 24th, so check it out if you're in Boston! I wanted to title the talk "Balls Out for Biofuels," but we had to settle for the less in-your-face (but still alliterative) "Fuels of the Future."

Science in the News

Coming Soon: The Adventures of Yeasty the Friendly Yeast

2008-09-08T20:36:00.000-07:00

Unicorn Justice

2008-08-24T20:49:00.000-07:00

UotH is back after a long summer hiatus with some disturbing news. A number of recent thefts in our building has led the Unicorns to take the law into our own hands. Since the thefts have occurred during lab meetings, I set up my webcam (with motion detection software, of course) to catch the thief red-handed. An old wallet with a tasty dollar bill sticking out was the bait.

The result:

Thanks a bunch D-train. Can I have my dollar back now? The real thief remains at large, so I may have to try hiding in the ceiling next time.

Stay tuned for more posts, including:

The Unicorns take on Hong Kong for SB 4.0
Michael's deportation to the Netherlands
Pimp my Bench
and more balls out stuff...

'08 Mission Patch

2008-05-20T11:07:00.000-07:00

The second calendar year of the UotH has now officially been opened with the presentation of the new mission patch! The awesomest UotH mission patch ever! so throw out all your '07 UotH merchandise and buy everything with the new logo!!!!!!

UotH Webshop now open!

2008-05-11T19:14:00.000-07:00

Once in awhile scientist have to go look for funds. Now it's my turn. As my stipend is running to its end, I need money OR go back home. Seeing as I do not wish to return to the middle ages in Europe, where I have to wear my wooden shoes while I'm picking tulips and being careful not to get hit by windmills, the only possibility is generating my own income: awesome Unicorns of the Hydrocalypse (UotH) apparel! So without further delay, I am proud to present to you some snazzy stuff, for him.
Support this good cause @ underwear: $49.95 t-shirts: $69.95

Our benches

2008-04-23T13:18:00.000-07:00

People on the internet love posting pictures of their desks online. Instead of posting real content, we thought we'd show you our benches so you can get to know us a little bit better. Remember--this is what real science looks like. And now, in no particular order, our benches:

Michael

Christina

Patrick

Jake

We did it

2008-04-01T05:56:00.000-07:00

After months of work, we Unicorns are proud to announce that we have created a yeast strain capable of generating hydrogen from sunlight or waste biomass (as long as it isn't corn). We're in the process of revising the paper we submitted to Nature, but as of this morning we already got the attention of CNN. More details to come, in the mean time check out our CNN interview.

Corn Sucks

2008-03-24T16:49:00.000-07:00

UotH Book Review: The Green Trap

2008-03-21T08:41:00.000-07:00

The boss came in the other day with three copies of Ben Bova's "The Green Trap." It seemed pretty relevant to us; a scientist is killed, ostensibly by oil company thugs, for his research on hydrogen producing cyanobacteria. His brother, Paul Cochrane, gets all bent out of shape and becomes determined to solve the crime. Through twists and turns, swordfighting (not kidding), and sexy time with Elena Sandoval ("No student, he immediately realized. Too well dressed. She was wearing a tailored white blouse and a midthigh skirt of deep green. Her face was oval. with lustrous dark hair pulled back tightly. Green eyes, almond-shaped, almost Oriental. Good figure. Nice legs" (p. 19).) our protagonist discovers the secrets to his brother's research.

How do these cyanobacteria make hydrogen, you ask? Well according to "The Green Trap," "'They split it out of the water molecules!' Cochrane was so excited he started bouncing up and down on the sofa. 'Water is haitch-two-oh! Two hydrogen atoms for every oxygen atom!'" (p. 132). Unicorns! We've been wasting our time! H2O!!! Helloooo!?!

Needless to say, like Tulius's staff we're "working balls-out to reproduce the murdered man's work" (p. 218).

Work at the Endy lab

2008-03-19T11:33:00.000-07:00

While surfing youtube/doing work, I happened to come across this little gem:

It looks like they've been busy in the Endy lab.

GDoS: Trofim Denisovich Lysenko

2008-02-07T16:14:00.000-08:00

Possibly the best known Russian Douchebag of Science outside of Russia, Trofim Lysenko spent his entire life studying biology without getting the first clue about anything. He came to prominence in the early 1930's, rising through the ranks of the Soviet Doucheocracy through political backbiting, calumny, slander, libel and general bitchiness. By 1940 he was director of the Institute of Genetics at the USSR's Academy of Sciences, charged with improving the productivity of Soviet agriculture. By 1948, this is true, it was illegal to scientifically dissent from the crackpot patchwork of scientific hoo-ha that came to be known as Lysenkoism.

So what was Lysenkoism? Lysenko rejected not only Darwinian evolution, which was obviously true even in those days, but also Mendelian genetics. To put this in perspective for non-biologists, that is roughly equivalent to a doctor believing that sick people do not exist. Also, the doctor sentences his enemies to death by starvation.

Lysenko believed instead in a variant of Lamarkian evolution. This was more or less the idea that you can make crops grow better by yelling at them. There was also something about soaking seeds in snow to make them grow better in the winter. Lysenko was given his own journal, The Bulletin of Vernalization, to publish his breakthrough research. In later years, presumably, many Soviet citizens would try to eat the pages of that journal.

Anyhoo, the world learned its lesson from Lysenko, and to this day there has never again been political interference in the scientific process. But we shall remember him forevermore as - a Great Douchebag of Science.

This man had no clue.

Hot Haploid on Haploid Action

2008-02-06T11:34:00.000-08:00

For those of you that don't think science is sexy or glamorous, feast your eyes on this video.

Sassy Bitches of Science: Marie Curie

2008-02-05T11:05:00.000-08:00

Marie Curie is perhaps the quintessential sassy bitch of science. She, along with her husband Pierre, discovered two radioactive elements, polonium, and radium, named for radiation, a word she also coined. For her work, she earned two (!) Nobel Prizes, one in Chemistry and one in Physics. She was the first woman to receive a Nobel Prize, the first person to receive two Nobel Prizes, and she remains the only person to have received two Prizes in two different scientific fields. Her husband shared the first Nobel Prize and her daughter, Irene, also won a Nobel in chemistry for her work on radioactivity. Wow.

She died in 1934 from aplastic anemia, having fried all of her bone marrow with radiation, since she did almost all of her experiments in a shed with no safety precautions. Some may think that this is badass, but please, don't try it at home.

Also, she is just totally HOT!

Hydroxygenator and the Hydrogenauts, part 1

2008-01-29T08:36:00.000-08:00

Biofuels in Unlikely Places

2008-01-24T05:02:00.000-08:00

For more hilarity with T-rex, click here.

Fictional Douchebags of Science™: Peter Parker a.k.a. “Spiderman”

2008-01-21T13:23:00.000-08:00

The franchise bandwagon of UotH thunders on as we bring you yet another succulent offshoot in the Douchebags of Science™ tree: “Fictional Douchebags of Science™" (FDoS). The mix of scientific progress and popular culture has lead to many exciting and enticing stories, but sometimes it leads to catastrophe, raising false hopes and unrealistic expectations with the general public, i.e. ignorant laymen.

This first edition focuses on the exploits of Peter Parker, also known as the smart mouthed webslinging, wall-hugging Spiderman. Nerdy by nature, Spiderman gets his science on on a regular basis. Ranging from physics to biology Peter is as “homo universalis” as they come. And he has a nice girlfriend. I mean getting your powers from a radioactive spider is one thing, but a scientist with a hot girlfriend? Oh and he sees pure DNA. Douche.

Sassy Bitches of Science: Hypatia

2008-01-15T07:39:00.000-08:00

Hypatia is considered the first notable woman in mathematics, living in Alexandria circa. 350-415 CE. She wrote and taught about philosophy, mathematics, and astronomy, and is credited with several inventions. What little information about her life survives indicates that she was an extremely sassy lady.

Though she was herself a pagan, early Christian authors held her as a symbol of virtue. She once even repelled a would-be suitor by showing him her used maxi pads. Despite her reputation, she came to an untimely and violent end at the hands of an angry Christian mob, convinced that she was causing the Egyptian Prefect to reject the Archbishop with her feminine wiles. Whether she was the first "witch" burned at the stake or actually involved in the strained relationship between the church and the state is still discussed, but there is little debate that she is one of the great Sassy Bitches of Science.

The best song about PCR of all time

2008-01-12T13:43:00.000-08:00

Thanks, Pablo!

Dutch-bag

2008-01-10T10:50:00.000-08:00

UotH welcomes our fourth Unicorn, Michael. Being from the Netherlands, he will head up our European bureau. We hear that there are a lot of douchebags over there.

Adventures in Synthetic Biology

2008-01-07T07:15:00.001-08:00

From Nick via a blog via Nature I found a comic book about synthetic biology by the people over at the MIT synthetic biology working group. The comic depicts the adventures of a child learning how to make biological devices with the help of a good looking lady in a lab-coat. I sort of wish I had that awesome DNA injector for my own adventures in synthetic biology, but I'm glad my bacteria don't have eyes.

UotH: The Mission Patch

2008-01-02T14:03:00.000-08:00

Michael, our Dutch ambassador here at UotH, has designed a jawsome NASA-style patch for our ongoing mission to design hydrogen-producing microbes. Coming soon the lab coat and flame-retardant jumpsuit of a Unicorn near you.

Official-looking Image Negates Entire Field of Research

2007-12-29T01:13:00.001-08:00

The following image has been floating around the internet, most recently on reddit.com:

As I was about to quit research and join the circus, I realized that biological systems could be engineered to be efficient sources of hydrogen. The numbers in the image seem arguable at best, made up at worst. As of right now I've put the clown option on hold and decided to focus on pro-biohydrogen graphic design instead:

I feel better already.

P.S. According to Wikipedia the image originated from Tesla Motors, makers of non-hydrogen cars.

My Math Hero: Gilbert Strang

2007-12-22T22:08:00.000-08:00

When TV was invented, it was expected to enlighten and embiggen humanity by allowing top quality academic learnings, theretofore only the privilege of the lucky few, to be beamed directly to the unlucky many. Ditto for the internet. But up until now, the best scientific content I've seen on the internet was a bunch of clowns making fun of Tycho Brahe on his birthday.

So what gives? The problem has been a shortage of compelling, charismatic math and science lecturers to break it all down for us. That's why humanity and I are thankful for the sweet mathematical stylings of Professor Gilbe rt Strang. This man rocks the chalk old school, old school like '99 when these lectures were originally recorded. The definitive Strang collection, including some of his later stuff on the Moore-Penrose pseudoinverse which had previously only been available as a bootleg, can be found on MIT OpenCourseWare. There is nothing I like better than a cold beer and to kick up my feet while Dr. Strang works his matrix magic.

I was moved to post this by a recent article on another MIT professor (Walter Lewin) whose physics-related act is achieving a certain amount of popular success, also on OpenCourseWare. Now I'm glad to see the genre succeed no matter who the frontman happens to be, but someone has to point out that Dr. Strang was there first and was doing it before it was cool. He is the Lou Reed of online math and science lecturing, or the DJ Kool Herc if you prefer. The Strangian influences are clear:

Strang 1999

Lewin 2007

The new stuff on the bottom is obviously more commercial, but regard the characteristic blue-dress-shirt-and-khakis. Strang pioneered that look and he owns it. Plus, Dr. Strang has the pure rock-and-roll sensibility to wear a tie on stage. A tie! I rest my case.

Sassy Bitches of Science: Barbara McClintock

2007-12-21T08:47:00.000-08:00

Born in 1902, this tremendously sassy lady grew to become one of the most important geneticists of her time, studying the behavior of chromosomes during replication and recombination, as well as discovering transposable elements. She also never married, used corn (corn!) as her model organism, and was the first and only woman to win an unshared Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine. Years after her death and several biographies later, no one can decide if her work wasn't taken seriously at first because she was a woman, she was too sassy, or people just weren't ready for how awesome it was. Overall, she was one sassy bitch.

Great Douchebags of Science™: Edward Teller

2007-12-18T06:07:00.000-08:00

Today we bring you another GDoS™, a scientist of nuclear douchebaggery. Edward Teller, along with fellow GDoS Robert Oppenheimer, was a key architect in the construction of the hydrogen bomb. Of course, we at UotH can't fault him for wanting to design a hydrocalyptic weapon. Dr. Teller earns the GDoS for a different reason: his advocacy for "non-military" applications of the H-bomb.

His most famous idea was Operation Chariot, where he proposed constructing a new harbor in Alaska by detonating multiple H-bombs. Presumably the new harbor would provide both a new deep water port and a source of SMSF. Unfortunately, those silly Eskimos took offense to this idea, so he just buried some radioactive material in their back yard instead. What a douche.

GDoS™: Erwin Schrodinger

2007-12-17T07:48:00.000-08:00

or am I???

Up and Coming Douchebags of Science: Dr. Chris Brown

2007-12-17T07:08:00.000-08:00

Look out science world! Here comes Dr. Brown! Congratulations on graduating, douchebag.

Stupid Lab Tricks

2007-12-16T12:27:00.000-08:00

While we're not busy solving the world energy crisis, we take some time to dazzle our labmates with unusual combinations of typical lab items. Today, we present "Dry Ice in a Glove:"

1. Put dry ice in a glove.

2. (OPTIONAL) Place in bucket with dry ice and water for more style points.

3. ???

Watch the video to see what happens.

A Call for Funding

2007-12-16T10:29:00.001-08:00

A recent article in the New York Times describes a shift in the way private companies pursue expensive, risky research in immensely important areas like alternative energy. The old model of lavishly funded, privately maintained internal laboratories is dead. Incidentally, this was the paradigm that delivered the totally kick-ass Bell Labs, which back in the day successfully pwned six Nobel Prizes. Evidently, the new model involves throwing money away on fruitless partnerships with non-Harvard, university-like institutions such as Stanford, UC Berkley, the University of Washington and someplace called Carnegie Mellon.

For the record, the Unicorns of the Hydrocalypse offer elite R & D packages for our corporate clients starting at $10 million. Satisfaction guaranteed.

Meet the authors

2007-12-14T08:51:00.000-08:00

Christina, Jake, and Patrick after a long day of theorizing and keeping it real

Personalized Energy?

2007-12-13T08:52:00.000-08:00

Honda is developing a "Home Energy Station" where you can power your house and your car with hydrogen produced from natural gas. Could be better (biohydrogen!) but still awesome.

UotH Annals of Science, Part 2

2007-12-12T14:18:00.000-08:00

Ours is first and foremost a scientific blog. But that need not mean it be accessible to the scientific community only. While many of our readers are educated science practioners, others are merely interested laypeople. To both groups, I heartily recommend this paper for a survey course, journal club, or a quiet read on a holiday beach. Ars sine scienta nihil est everyone!

Great Douchebags of Science™: Tycho Brahe

2007-12-12T10:35:00.001-08:00

Another regular feature on UotH will be devoted to some of our favorite people: The Great Douchebags of Science™.

Today we celebrate Tycho Brahe, the astronomer with the douchiest name. As if just being named Tycho wasn't douchy enough, he was born Tyge Ottesen Brahe and adopted the latinized Tycho at age fifteen. He was a Danish nobleman in the late 16th century, known by nerds and eight grade science students as a great astronomer whose detailed observations of planetary motion allowed another GDoS™ to prove that the earth moved around the sun in an elliptical orbit.

Here at UotH we know him better as the guy who wore a gold false nose after he lost part of his own in a duel, hired a dwarf to sit under his table during dinner, had a tame moose living in his castle until it got drunk and fell down the stairs to its death, and died from bladder strain. What a d-bag.

UotH Annals of Science, part 1

2007-12-10T20:10:00.000-08:00

UotH Annals of Science will be a column that reviews the prolific scientific papers of our time. For the inaugural installment, I present Dr. T. R. Tiersch's opus, "Apomorphine-induced vomiting in rainbow trout (Salmo gairdneri)."

Introduction
The opening passage speaks for itself, so I have reproduced it here in its entirety:

Vomiting, or emesis, has been well described in mammals, but little has been published about its occurrence in other vertebrates. Indirect evidence suggests that large, predatory fish were vomiting over 300 million years ago.

I challenge the reader to offer two sentences from any scientific writing that bleed with more genuine relevance than those quoted above. When this paper was published in 1988, the field of non-mammalian vomiting was in its infancy. Tiersch's work here paved the way for today's NonMamVom research.

Key Experiments
Innovative methods, such as inserting plastic balls into the trout's esophagus, allowed concrete measurement of vomit magnitude. For the first time, vomiting behavior (VB) could be quantitatively described, which any Systems Biologist will tell you is pretty damn important. Table 3 demonstrates the power of the new VB metric:

Identifying VB also allowed the authors to distinguish emesis from other fish behaviors, such as a behavior the author's determined to be "coughing." By this simple observation, the untapped potential of the market for fish pharmaceuticals became immediately apparent.

Best Quote

Systematic research in fish emesis may furnish "ichthyoemetics" for use as an adjunct administered prior to existing techniques such as pulsed gastric lavage for collection of gastric contents from live fish.

Word.

Rating
8.6/10

Conclusion
Mammalian vomiting behavior has had its day in the sun. Time to give fish a chance.

What I'll be driving after the hydrocalypse

2007-12-07T11:37:00.000-08:00

Click for video

Hello world

2007-12-06T13:44:00.000-08:00

We are the unicorns of the hydrocalypse and we're here to bring you the truth from our corner of the internet.